Quote:
Originally Posted by CastlesInTheAir
I can't figure out what to call this or why it's happening.. So for example, I want to go upstairs to get a banana. I will sit on my bed telling myself to go upstairs to get the darn banana but can't seem to get myself to and I get this really uncomfortable feeling of tension or something. I either eventually get the banana or end up just in a mental lock or something. Or if I finally end up getting the banana I will still have this uneasy feeling. This happens with simple things and with anything involving going out into the world. Recently this wasent as bad for awhile but it seems to be picking up again.
Any thoughts?
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I have a problem like this. It's related to executive functioning and seems common among people with ADHD, ASD, and TBI. TBI resources call it initiation impairment or initiation deficit. It's sometimes referred to as "procrastination" or (lack of) "motivation," but I don't like calling it those because those can mean other things. The best description I've found for it is "a weird urge to not do things."
Depression makes it worse, but it happens even when my depression is in remission. And of course, the problem itself is potentially terrible enough to cause you enough sadness to be considered "depressed."
This is my biggest problem, so it's a matter close to my heart. However, I haven't been able to find much help. The most helpful thing I've found is by far ADHD meds (specifically Adderall in my case), but even that is inadequate.
This page has everything I know, which is not much.
That page is focused on life-long problems that are presumably developmental, e.g. ADHD, but I'm guessing initiation impairment could also be caused by other causes of executive dysfunction, e.g. anesthesia side effects (post-operative cognitive dysfunction), other drug side effects, aging, certain health problems, etc.
There was an
"Ask a Therapist" question that sounded like the same problem, but I didn't think the answer was too helpful.