jinnyann

I know EXACTLY how you feel!! Frustrated, powerless and very hurt by the fact that your son, who you love spoke to you so disrespectfully and your husband who is "supposed" to support you in your discipline of your children totally disregarded your authority and his position to stand by you and just sided with your son!! HUGH!!!!!

Jin, I think it's time that you assert yourself and confront your hubby about this issue.

I'm doing a How to be assertive & people skills workshop at the moment, so I myself am only learning, however I feel that the best way to asset yourself in this instance is with "I" statements.

For example, you could say something like this to your hubby "Hubby (whatever his name is), I feel very hurt and victimised when I try to discipline our son and you side with him , ignoring what I had to say in regard to . . . . (whatever it was). Hubby, when I'm disciplining our son I would really appreciate your support."

Keep it short and sussinct . . . You could write your own script for this. Practice it before you say it. Start with "I" (how you feel) then explaination of why you feel the way you do then finally what you would like him to do.

I have tried this myself at work and in my own personal life and found it to be the best way to assert yourself and not come across aggressively.

Words hurt and people who supposedly love you should know that there are times their words and behaviour upset you and in turn upset the relationship and your family.

Good luck and God bless xx