Sounds like maybe the baseline of depression without that distraction. I have bipolar 2 and wasn't feeling too well around last year -- depression, anxiety, hypomania...I was a 9 year smoker and I always looked forward to going outside for a cigarette, especially when I was alone with those difficult feelings. I quit about a year ago, but when I did, all the symptoms of my disorder felt much stronger. I realized that smoking was masking how bad the bipolar had gotten.