Thanks for sharing. I think I know quite fast if a T could help me or not. Itīs much about her attitude and her way of looking on issues and problems. My first T said itīs bad to pathologize too much and I really agree with that. My second T who I just left was within public mental health care and there too much is about finding a diagnosis to treat and very little is about understanding other causes like societal impact upon people.
I think issues like perfectionism, improving self image and similar arenīt issues that are generally dealt with within the Swedish mental health care. Those who seek care for such issues in contrast to more "severe" and medical mental issues are mostly found at private T:s.
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Originally Posted by feileacan
I think this is a very good expectation from a therapist. However, I would like to point out that even with such a therapist it can take a loooooong time to get there because most probably your defences are very strong and very rigid and it can take really a long time for a therapist to find a way to reach behind that wall (even if theoretically she is able to do that). This is not said to attack you but rather, I have very personal experiences with that. I, too, have some very strong defences that make me very avoidant and also perfectionistic. A part of me is able to see those things from a perspective and so I don't have the need to blame my T, I can understand that this is a difficult combo and both I and the T need a lot of patience to just keep trying.
Perhaps the main question for you would be whether you think you would be able to spot the right therapist before she has been actually able to find a way to reach you? Or would you quit before out of frustration that again it was someone who wasn't able to help you. Because in order to succeed you actually have to stick with her long enough.
Anyway, I'm sorry about your situation. It really is a tough one. I hope with time you are able to figure out and seek out the help that is best suited for you.
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