When I was in college, there were periods of time when I was feeling outgoing and happy and but sometimes I also felt sort of depressed. I lived in a dormitory for 3 years of college and my roomate(s) would notice when I was slipping into depression before I even noticed it myself. You have had to learn to bury many of your emotions in order to negotiate your childhood. I went to a therapist for the first time at age 52 after a serious suicide attempt. The first skill she taught me was how to start learning to recognize what was bothering me. During my childhood, my mom would get so stressed out about stuff that I learned to hide my troubles from her. So I just kept things to myself. And I was the oldest so my mom just needed to spend more time with my brother and sister because I was more mature. For me, my emotions tend to feel like surges of adrenaline, shooting pains in my stomache etc. I don't ignore them now. I try to think about what event happened right before I got that physical feeling and analyze it. My therapist asks me to journal my feelings. I journaled a lot when I was first trying to heal. Basically, you are going to need to learn to train yourself to "feel" things. During childhood, you learned to ignore your feelings. A therapist might help. Though I had these problems, I was able to get a college degree in 4 years and I completed my master's degree while serving in the military. So you have some problems to overcome but your life can still be successful. Good luck on your journey through life.