So what is stopping you from seeing a psychiatrist now? You are crying out for help and answers yet you seem not to be following them. This is not something you can do on your own.

If you are still undertaking school - see the guidance counsellor. See your family doctor and ask for a referral to a psychiatrist.

On another note. Bipolar can be misdiagnosed as Depression if the individual is in a down cycle. Many anti-depressants are the worst things that can be prescribed to a bipolar person. Some of them can actually cause a manic event and even worse depression with suicide ideation.

Please get yourself some help. We care.