Mouse I can relate to what you're saying. I feel like I am just now starting to realize how warped my world had become and that Therapy might actually help me. At one point in my life I had managed to escape my past, put it behind me, and embark on a better life. Only to realize now that my past left me vulnerable, blind, and easy prey for the type of manipulation I'm living with now. Although I see it now, I'm afraid that I will discontinue therapy before I really get to the point of self awareness that is necessary to avoid these pitfalls in the future. I've been to this point before but didn't really grasp the situation fully and slipped backwards. Hopefully I will stick it out and deal with some of my unresolved issues and hopefully my T won't kick me out of therapy before I do.

I need to stop thinking that I don't deserve, or am not sick enough, or abused enough, etc... to warrant the benefits of therapy and ultimately achieve happiness. I know this but I really haven't gotten myself to full believe it yet.