You are not guilty of anything Zedsdead,why should you put up with abuse or feel responsible for his emotions,to be honest the issue is his threats to kill you,doesn't that worry you?He may feel bad but that is cos he has lost the person he uses as a crutch to get stuff from that gets him through,why feel sorry for him when you know if you take him back he will feel ok again and then turn abusive on you again.You know it is a vicious circle of him being loving kind or in pieces until he wins you back then he gets angry abusive and neglectful towards you again.Don't let your feelings of guilt dictate use your head and protect yourself and the kids stay away from him.If you think he will carry out his threats to kill you inform the police.Stay safe and keep up the resolve to remove him from your life.