So, I saw T this morning and we talked quite a bit. Surprisingly(not sure why i felt/feel that way), she agreed that meds and hospital should be an absolute last resort. I told her of my plan that I found for some dietary changes I'm going to try to make. It's called Whole30. In my researching the post-withdrawl effects of going off psych meds(though it's been 9 months) I found a recommendation for the Whole30. Anyway, I'm also supposed to start getting some kind of physical activity in as well even if only 10 minutes. Hopefully by April 1st I will be prepared to start. My goal is actually next weekend but I'm giving myself a little coushion. I'm trying not to set myself up to fail but also give myself to better prepared. We'll see. I do fully plan to start by april 1 but hopefully sooner. I got an instant pot which once I learn to use it should make cooking easier. CAN'T WAIT! I'm scheduled again with T for 8 weeks out(obviously she trusts me which I had convinced myself betwen scheduling the appt and going in wasnt true). That will be 30+ days after I start Whole30. Even the slightest change in energy and mental clarity would be well worth the changes I'm going to make!