yeah she said i dissociate a lot, living on the deep end of a dissociative scale, but i dont know what she diagnosed me with... she doesnt specialize in dissociation so i dont think she is really comfortable treating me...
she said that i have borderline personality traits at one point...

last time she just talked about going to these rehab places and said she wasnt sure how much more she could help me in therapy currently and that it would be good for me to go get the help i need inpatient and stuff

the little bit of inssurance i have wont cover much so its not easy for me to get a diagnosis i guess.. i've been through the ringer

the reason i became convinced that its d.i.d. is because i read a lot... a lot of stories and everything and it seemed like pretty much all of them had similar stories of misdiagnosis and treatment... but im thinking now maybe i made it all up because i was confused, but im also thinking that is part of denial and cold feet trying to keep me from going to this place...

i hate mental illness so bad...

it sucks not being consistent, to be like this...



but like you said, whatever it is it impacts my life negatively and i need to fix it some how.. before its too late :/

thanks for your kind words, i appreciate it