I am sorry if it seems I have hijacked this thread.I do feel the need to ramble though....

One thing I do know for sure though is when I have been triggered and having PTSD symptoms,in my mind my husband IS a narcissist and an abuser and a complete douche bag and I hate him and everything about him.He no longer is that loving,caring,kind man that I so dearly love and becomes someone I feel so unsafe around and don't want to be married to and feel like I would rather be dead than have to continue living one more minute with him.He is everything from my past rolled into one,he is a



Of course none of those things are real or true about him.It's all just in my mind.Those are only what I think of him when PTSD is in the picture,other times I am pretty happy and content with him.

And that's why I said I don't know how much is really my husband and how much is my own ****.

...I think I'm finished rambling now.....