You said he needs help.. but I think you need help, as well. Are you sure you're really gaining something from this relationship? From what you write, it seems like you've done all you can to help him.. but if he keeps rejecting those offers, you can't really do anything else. So no need to feel guilty about it (beware of emotional manipulation ). Now your money and children - that's a bigger problem. You've said you're looking for a better job.. hope you'll find one, and once you do, get away from hom