From reading what you wrote and your responses, you're simply unhappy. I've been there. I think we all have. The worst thing feeling is to not only feel unhappy, but trapped.

Oh man - can I relate.

Ultimately, you will snap. That's simply what is going to happen if you guys don't discuss this. You'll probably snap anyway because you've been "holding the peace" too long.
You're going to get so fed up that this might be the only way to get things out.

Even the most non-confrontational person has a breaking point, and I can so relate to what you wrote. I dated a guy that got mad at me because he wasn't able to read my texts, check my email, and even got upset when I visited family. I put up with this for a year until I finally said I was leaving.

I did snap. It was ugly, but he wouldn't listen otherwise.

Most of us don't like living in a cage. Having to justify every single thing that doesn't involve the person we're supposed to care about for two seconds is exhausting.
"who's that" and "where are you going" is too much to explain all the time.
It's also invasive, manipulative, and possessive. There is a balance with relationships, but from what I've read you guys don't have one.

Listen to your gut. That's what I tell everyone I know. Listen to it. It's usually right. And then decide what you need to do.

We're talking about your happiness too. All of this sucks, but look at the big picture. Is there one with her?

There's your answer.

Good luck.