I agree with Trippin. The most dangerous time for a woman is when she leaves. The abuser has lost control and becomes angry. It's best you don't tell him your leaving. Leave when he is at work etc.

Gather identification for your kids and yourself. Any important documents too. Careful when packing and hide out of site so he doesn't know.

I understand you feel panicked to be at a shelter. They are understanding and will guide if you tell them how you feel.

I was in an abusive relationship. My abuser broke bones etc. After I left I needed a few surgeries due to the damage he caused.

You are strong and think of the freedom you and your children will have. Nobody deserves to be abused and remember this is not your fault.