Your dad and brother being there is part of why your husband moved in with mom. I kind of see his point. No relationship you are in will have the chance of a snowball in Hades, while you are still living with your dad. Are you living in dad's house, or is it your apartment? No social support support agency can somehow get you "out of this." Your husband and you are both victims of having been born into families that see their children as caretakers. That's not how it works in our culture. You have to emancipate yourself from dad, or your life will always suck. You should not be "dealing with their individual issues." (Dad's and brother's.) You don't know how and you don't have the energy or the means.

Apply for a housing subsidy. Get on the waiting list. Apply at some low income housing projects for a two bedroom apartment. That's where you belong - on your own with your children. That's enough issues for you right there. I know you are a very loyal person . . . to your husband and to your dad and brother. But your loyalty is misplaced.

Your husband and you might actually have a chance of reconciling, if the two of you weren't all entangled with each of your parents. His mom doesn't need help. She needs to accept living within her means. That's not her condo. She rents it. She can't afford a condo. She needs to find a little studio apartment.

Your husband didn't come by yesterday to visit the kids. He came by to see you. He misses you, but he can't deal with being in the middle of the circus that is where you live. I don't blame him.

The smartest thing you and your kids's father could do is to let his mom and your dad handle their own lives . . . and you, your guy and your two kids get a place all your own - just a four room apartment. If I were you, that's what I would do - quickly - while he still wants you, and he does. You're living in a pressure cooker that would drive any guy out the door, and it will drive you stark, screaming mad. Let your dad work out his own situation. Maybe your brother belongs in a group home . . . IDK. But you do not belong there.

You are all a bunch of folk who are way too entangled up in everyone else. Nobody knows where their problems end and other people's problems begin.

Get yourself that two bedroom apartment . . . in a public housing project, if necessary. But get out of there.