Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopingtrying
I have told him generically that I post at the PC forum. That it's social. That I have friends here. Since I know you have read many of my posts (and vice versa), I bet you would agree that 90 percent of my posts are about me not anyone in my family. Sometimes I do overshare. It happens when I am emotional/impulsive. If he reads this then he just knows the truth about how I feel. The issue for me is: Would he tell me lies in order to manipulate/control me? Since last summer, 50 percent of the conversations with my T are about conversations H and I have. I would rather discuss this with a T but we can't afford it right now and it's really bothering me. PC is my free therapy. I do agree with you that he could be watching me and not telling me. I wish I hadn't told my kids about my current problem this weekend but they said, "He probably is."
|
Hopingtrying, I read through this entire thread and the impression I get of your husband is that he is very manipulative and controlling of you. He knows how to push your buttons, so he pushes them a lot. It's as if he needs you to be on edge around him, so that he can keep you in his control. Does that sound accurate? It's just the impression I get about your husband's character based on what you've written here.
No, your husband has no business monitoring anything that you're doing. 1. You are not a child. You are an adult. It is none of his business where you go online, to seek support. 2. There is such a thing as having boundaries in relationships. It doesn't sound like your husband and you have very clear boundaries, but are rather too enmeshed with your boundaries. 3. I didn't like reading how your husband tries to control you, with is remarks about not letting you buy your son's favorite organic food vs. commercial type. That is just plain controlling behavior. It comes across to me, like your husband doesn't respect you or the close relationship you have with your children, so he wants you to fear him, and choose him over them. I could be way off, because this is the internet.
I would just try to stand your ground, set clear boundaries with your husband by not being afraid to call him out on his controlling behavior. If you need another adult to mediate, seek marriage counseling so you have another witness to all the abuse your husband inflicts upon you (controlling behavior, verbal abuse, trying to keep you in a victim role).
If you have to take your meds to keep your husband calm, that is very disturbing to me because the meds are supposed to be for your benefit -- not his.
Anyway, good luck. I hope you can work things out. Your husband doesn't sound like he is a good marriage partner to you or a good father to his children based on what I've read in this thread.