(((safe hug))) Please seek professional help. You don't have to suffer like this, thinking it was your fault and that you allowed him to violate you. The psychological aspects of rape go much farther than what you think you feel as true.

Sometimes confrontation does wonders, but I would advise against it until you have worked though this experience with someone helping you. Why not write him a letter and don't mail it, nor give it to him. It would also help to share that with a psychologist.

TC