Money doesn't buy happiness. I was ... very wealthy ... when I was with my ex. We married poor and both graduated from college and got jobs. We made a lot of money. More than we knew what to do with, truly. I'm a lawyer but I'm now disabled. My financial picture has changed, my housing, his lifestyle hasn't. We spent 700k to divorce...lots of cash wasted on legal fees because he didn't want me to have what's legal and dragged it four 1/2 years...in a no-contest divorce state. Money doesn't equate happiness.

That said, it is stressful to not know how your next bill will be paid. I have been poor before. If you can't make more money and need money, find ways to spend less.

I'm sorry regarding your son. Maybe he is being manipulated by his father, controlled. My ex told our daughter that if she didn't like his new live-in girlfriend--he told our sweet teenager her relationship with him would change for the WORSE. I have her in therapy, as he controls her on the 50% time she is with him.

Your son is older, but he didn't choose his parents...he may be in a situation of control. Reach out to him, don't complain (you posted wanting to work on that), tell him you love him. Don't mention his father. I know it's hard. I understand. Is he empathetic, your son?