Quote:
Originally Posted by graystreet
I probably didn't explain as well as I should have because the post was already looooong. I hear what you're saying about complicated friendships. I tend to overcomplicate things....really, I think from his perspective it's that he takes dating very seriously, doesn't date unless he feels it will be a pretty permanent thing. I don't think he sees us doing well in the long run, and I get that. I know he cares about me, thinks I'm pretty awesome. So he feels like, hey, you want to hang out, cool. You don't, that is okay, I will respect that. There's no physicality involved, btw.
I am the kind of person who has very few but close friendships, and that's always how I've been. I mean, I've always known a ton of people, had a ton of acquaintances but it takes a bit for me to form close, meaningful bonds with people. So I guess when I do I tend to be okay if sometimes they are little complicated. A little bit, at least. If this person WERE being malicious, I'd be out. The rest of my few friendships are easy-peasy.  |
I am sorry. It was a long post. I also do long posts and only a handful of people can stay with me.
I was thinking I had a friendship that became very complicated. This guy and I were friends then he wanted to take it to another level. I didn't. We kept on as platonic friends. But then he would pressure me to get romantic. It was...complicated.
At one point he even moved to be closer to where I was living. I wasn't leading him on. It got very push pull....for years!
I really liked this person as a friend. He was unusual. I remember back then thinking some woman would be lucky to have him. But not me.
Eventually he found a woman years later. I was living with my boyfriend at the time. And he and his girlfriend visited us. It was strange because on some level I was actually a bit jealous. Happy for him. But jealous.
Maybe there was a bit of attraction deep down that I did not acknowledge because I knew we weren't right for one another.
The point is we really couldn't remain on a friend level and it wasn't going to a romantic level. So it was kind of a dead end.
It was very complicated. I didn't talk about it because...I probably never could have explained it properly.
Good luck. It is a meaningful connection for you on some level and you are probably growing as a result of it. So all connections are meaningful no matter the outcome.
My "friend" used to send me beautiful little notes and postcards and I still have them. And I am a person who rarely saves things like that. Life is a mystery and people are mysterious.