Thank you for the reply. Meds have helped me a lot, too.

I told my friend that if I were feeling like I was going to lose my stuff or start picking, I would remove myself from the conversation and take a beat. I have a tendency to feel irritable and start taking it out on whomever I'm speaking to because I want them to listen, or to make me feel better. The issue is that they just aren't going to be able to do that. Only time will. What bothers me is that I don't know if I will ever be better about this.

I have a really bad tendency to beat myself up about things. I beat myself up because my guy friend doesn't want to date me because of this issue, and when I have flashes of anger, I just feel worse. I beat myself up when I feel moody around friends, thinking of myself as "crazy." I know that I need to go easier on myself and give myself credit because I've been through a lot and have come out the other side in pretty good shape. And I'm only human. But I'm not very good at that.