Guys, I just want to share this interesting thing I discovered while thinking. I was wandering why, despite the termendeous amount of effort and hard work I do and the potential capability I have, I am in a very unpleasant condition. Although I was able to go collage, I am failing many credentials and have very little friends as well as changing part time jobs occasionally, hindering my revenue and dependent on my parental financial assistance. From a objective viewpoint, this is far, far away from what I wanted to be. And to this day, I did not know why I can screw up this much. I do often get a lot of chances. Indeed, I am in a very blessed, opportunity rich environment, yet, I make unthinkable mistakes in my decision making and killing almost every single opportunity. However, I realized one huge suspect I would have never thought about.

Fear of Success

I read this in a psychology article somewhere online and realized how much it describes my case. Looking back at my childhood, I often screwed all my success. When I made a perfect homework project and prased by my parents and teachers, I often destroyed it right in front of it quite violently. When I made a giant model and praised my friends, asking me to preserve and make it better by next time we meet each other, I destroyed right after they went home. I felt a strange deep satisfaction and was relieved. Going back to present. I think this is the main source of my problem and inefficiency.

Are you guys familiar with this symptom and are there any knowledge for cure? I think I need help for this because I'm entering the workforce soon and I want it fixed by then.

Hay, but I'm kinda happy finding things out! Just don't want to spoil this cool discovery.

Guys, seriously, this is potentially life changing discovery! I'm super exited about your thoughts into this!!