M.

I finally have words for how I feel, and have felt since I left Monday night.

So much came out/forward at one time!

So much was brought out. Then. Time was up.

Wait! What do I do with this?

It feels like being emotionally raw and numb at the same time. It feels like that very detached feeling combined with a weepy sadness. It's very hard to put words to.

I'm not myself and I know it. People in my space are getting aggravated with me because I can't pretend to be "ok" - it's too real and too numb. I can't morph into normal (by their standards) and "act" like all is well. It makes me angry but the numbness covers that too.

Monday doesn't seem that far away. It feels like this past Monday was just yesterday.

I so need help sorting this out! I don't know what to do with this until Monday. Hopefully Monday will be here before I realize it.

Trail