I really understand what you are saying. I'm trying to move on with my life. Joined softball leagues, gym, concentrating on work, spending time with my children but I'm lonely. I'm in the military and I can't just start seeing other people. If I get caught doing that, I could be charged under the UCMJ for adultery and lose money, my rank and career. It's not worth it. My wife can cheat, sleep around and she has no repurcussions. Either way, I'm not ready to move on to the next woman. I'm trying my hardest to change my flaws even though what she is doing isn't right. My therapist asked me a great question. She asked "How long would you wait on your wife" I told her a few months to see where it goes, because I have to live my life as well and can't be in limbo. She stated "It seems by what you just said, you already gave up". She told me you can't put a time limit on love. You have to be patient. She also said she didn't expect me to wait more than a year but to keep the contact about the children, stop communicating with her in regards to the marriage and SHOW HER YOU CAN CHANGE BY YOUR ACTIONS. This made sense to me as I pleaded, begged and it made me looked pathetic . This is my second marriage and my first wife cheated on me while I was deployed in Iraq in 2003. It's just a crappy situation to be in again. I was only married 3 years the first time but 10 years this time. She did a 180 on me while I was gone and found happiness after the last few years of us going through the motions. I wish I would have tried as hard as i am now back then... to be honest I just hate my life right now. It's hard to focus on my kids cause they remind me of my wife. Even songs on the radio or stores we used to go into reminds me of her.