i'm glad too Sabrina... if only my real family had even some of the kindnesses as of many i've met here...

i remember at 10 i had never even thought of not liking/respecting/loving both of my parents unconditionally...

it wasnt til later on... maybe 14 or so, i disapproved when i found Dad somewhat embellishing his stories to make himself look a little bit more John Wayne than the way it really happened.. no biggie, but i wished he could just be honest...

with my mom it so different... they'd divorced and re-married years ago... her "accident" happened when I was 8 or 9... not enough of her left to go around to all the kids so i was "chosen" to live w/Dad... I loved Dad, didn't see that as a problem... but why me????

anyway, because of mom's condition i was incapable of finding fault with her.. she just seemed so victimized to me... years later i now am painfully aware of why DUI is wrong...

and she just didn't have much chance to get well... medicine then is not what it is now... everyone said it was a miracle she lived at all... but no insurance and having now 2 children (minus me) to raise and her then husband of the time decided to split... she just had to get back to work asap...

i was miles away, couldn't do anything to help her then...

recently her last child, my 1/2 sis, now 24 married and moved away... still nearby, but not in the house anymore... i was out travelling... things at mom's place fell into disrepair...

none of the other kids would do a thing to help... my older sis was too scarred from everything... she just wanted distance... still does...

my 1/2 bro... just a partyin', card playin, womanizin', mixed up not so young a man anymore... has that thing called charisma... people dote on him... with his busy life he has no time to help mom.. i'm real angry about that...

mom just tries to hold herself together... i'm so glad she could retire... but she needs help... she knows that... i even feel sorry that she knows she needs someone like she does... nothing changes the past... i just wnted to breath new life into the family... but no one seems to care but me...