I'm so sorry you were in a narcissistic relationship. I was, too, for 26 years. I discarded him, divorced him last year and he has already remarried the new supply(fuel) I moved to where I love, the water, left the life I had with behind and am still trying to put my life back together emotionally. I believe a fresh start would be good for you; don't hesitate to start over. Just be thankful you didn't waste more years that you now have to enjoy. Peace and light.