I relate too. What I do is make my "own" plans and then they lose their "authority". I worked for 10+ years part-time just so I could "practice" interviewing and quitting jobs since that was difficult/anxiety-provoking for me. Think of something you want to learn in your life and how to work on it and for how long, etc. and your life becomes more "yours" and less the people out there's.
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"Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius
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