Everything went the wrong way. I'm exhausted.

Everyone I knew at work was fired due to the financial cuts. They fired, like, 200 people, including my co-worker, the lovely guy I had a contact with and many other people. Those people were giving me the motivation to stay at work, despite my physical illness and anxiety, agoraphobia. Going there is a huge stress for me because it's like 60 km away from my hometown. And now I'm completely alone and isolated. I started getting very serious infections, so I already been on sick leave like three times.

The workplace has changed too, I mean they broke all the promises and changed the rule of the game completely. Now it's more like a labour camp, where we are forced to work 10 days in a row, with barely any days off in between (not illegaly, though, everything is done as the law allows). The atmosphere is pretty tense, we have to work much harder than we had to in the beginning. I've lost my whole motivation towards this job, it's nothing special now, just like many others. I have a small chance for promotion and being moved to another position, yet it's still the same place etc. I feel like I want to collect as much money as I can get and leave.

I feel pretty down and exhausted and have this constant feeling that I've lost something that goes far beyond the funeral and recent death of a family member. I feel isolated and my bad social skills and social anxiety don't make it much better. I went to a party not so long ago to meet my old friends and felt like we have nothing in common anymore and that I'm not much accepted. I quickly got very drunk because I didn't intend to control myself much and was tired after the long working day and change of shift, I ended up in a toilet, vomiting and crying. I'm overwhelmed.