Dear Dr. S,
28 hours and counting to check in. I so should have asked for an anti-anxiety med at my last session. I have to say that I don't think I expected this level of stress since it has been something I have wanted for over 20 yrs. I've been told this is normal, what I am experiencing is typical and understandable given the procedure. Unlike my last surgery where I didn't want to do it at all; this one, I just want to get it over with and I hope it is not a mistake. And I am more scared than I've ever been with a surgery.

I think there is a level of being afraid of a let down because I want it so badly. What if it doesn't help, doesn't let me feel what I think/hope I will feel? What if I still can't look in the mirror and recognize the person staring back at me?

- me