Went to see my Primary care physician to discuss my ongoing health issues and get his assistance in having some tests ran, and helping me find a mental health worker whose actually competent. I've decided to go to arbitration with my provider and fight the abuses I suffered at their hands in their ER facility as well as the abuse I received from my PDOC and at their impatient facilities.

Family stress is crazy. Had to send my son to live with his father (a man who abused me in every way possible) so this is beyond difficult. Dealing with him has been a nightmare but when I mentioned I worried our son has BIPOLAR, he said "Kaiser's tried to diagnose me with that 6 times" and chuckled it off. I'm beginning to think I have bipolar by proximity.

Making progress but feel like it could all go south any second. I have plans which could really help me, and in turn my whole family. Feeling hopeful but scared. Need to learn meditation.