Thread: done lurking
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Old Nov 24, 2007, 03:53 PM
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Cthomas Cthomas is offline
Grand Poohbah
 
Member Since: Sep 2007
Location: Chicago
Posts: 1,746
Hi all. Ive been lurking for quite some time, I have add/bipolar and have also been abused as a kid. My parents had myself and my brother, he was older. They thought he was a prince, little did they know that he used to hold me down and rape me when they left me with him. The abuse didnt stop there. My parents used to say, well "steve" is good looking and smart, but colleen....hmmm....we just hope she finds a rich man. shes not very smart. I used to get yelled at on a daily basis from a abusive alcoholic father. and my mother, just thought I was stupid. I think she became a "product" of my father. My parents were only concerned with how people saw us. The clean kids, with nice clothes. Meanwhile at home I was called a *****, stupid, and lots of other things I just dont feel like saying just yet. I was abused by a man in our neighborhood whom i used to babysit for. he would have me come over to watch his kids when his wife was at work, then send the kids outside so he could molest me. I turned to coke and pot by my teens, tried to end myself many times. Im now 39 and seeing a therapist and working with EMDR therapy. Its helping, and its also dredging up stuff I didnt realize i blocked out. You will hear more and more as I get better acquainted. Luckily my husband is a good man. I guess Im feeling as if he could do better than me right now. Ive been fortunate enough to have been "adopted" by another woman, my new mom, in the last 2 years. Im diabetic and so is she. met her on a diabetes web support group and she got me into therapy. My mom now is wonderful. I wish all of you could have the second chance I am getting now. Sorry for this being so long, and possibly broken up a bit. Just felt like getting it all out finally. Nice to meet you all.
Colleen
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