IMO I don't think it's necessarily a bad thing being 'monitored' as such - perhaps it all hinges on our definitions of monitoring and what is/isn't acceptable to us.

For instance the church thing - some people do become fixated with religion as part of their MI, and upping involvement may be a sign that their MH is a cause for concern. Note I am absolutely not saying this is the case with you Hopingtrying, but it was the case with me in the past so for my H me going to church often would be a red flag.

While I must admit I was concerned about your H reading this thread if that was okay with you then that is all that counts - and if it's got you two talking more honestly then I think that's got to be good. Hope that this thread has helped