i should be asleep. after sleeping like 18 hours a night this weekend, i have been averaging only just 6 hours a night during the work week. i know this isnt sustainable, or healthy. sleep and i have a complicated relationship.

i hope my gp will agree to let me try adding the stimulant my pdoc suggested- the prospect that maybe something will actually help with this crushing depression is giving me a little bit of hope.

i am trying to not succumb to the negative thoughts depression keeps telling me.
Negative self talk, sui ideation, oversleeping, and mentally shutting down are all pretty ****** coping mechanisms. i can do better. My brain isn't gonna be Depression's biatch anymore...

have a good night everyone. keep fighting the good fight.