Are there any soothing activities you know of? You just have to get through tonight then you have your pdoc appointment and hopefully they can help you calm down. I know you're anxious about the appointment. That happens to many people but often the worry is unfounded and the doctors are helpful. Do your best not to think about it. I'm sorry you are feeling so bad. I was a mess after my psychotic manic episode. It did pass though. Yours will too. Hang in there and keep posting.