I agree -- the recurring theme appears to be "feeling hurt". Losing someone you care about hurts. Guilt arises from you losing control of your anger, or even having anger in general. Guilt hurts too. And of course your life "taking a turn for the worst" also hurts too.

Maybe you need to discuss with your therapist how you can confront and "overcome" hurt? In my opinion, you dissociate because you want to make that hurt go away. But plenty of people do this dissociation thing, so you're definitely not alone.

So again, I think your therapist can definitely help you with confronting hurt. Maybe she can give you some useful tips? I know you said she isn't helping very much, but maybe it's best to just tell her that you have recurring feelings of hurt, and that those feelings arise from guilt, loss, "failures", and betrayal? That cuts right to the point and avoids you from having to say things that she has to read the lines between. And ask her how you can "prevent" dissociation?

I think the whole "living in the past" thing falls under the "loss" category, which also includes loss of loved ones.