Starrysky,

In the social forum, At Jesus' Feet: SeptemberMorn says, "Anger is caused by our own unfulfilled desires." This makes a lot of sense to me. If the men we date are not treating us right, for example, ordering us around rather than asking what we prefer to do it is only when we have the courage to say, "no" that we will feel better about ourselves. We also feel better when we directly ask for the things we want. Talking about how you were hurt in the past helps a little and so does time but sometimes there can be experiences that stay with us to some extent. I think the best way forward is just to make better decisions in the here and now. After all, in a way, our memories are no longer happening so they aren't real (that's how I think about a few of them when I relive them in my mind). What is real is the present. So maybe focus on fulfilling your own desires today, rather than allowing yourself to be used. Always put your own needs first before you meet the needs of others. Good friends and bfs will allow you to do this. And I do hope your anger diminishes--anger is a very destructive emotion. Hope this isn't to lectury, I also sometimes have trouble standing up for the things that are important to me and am trying to improve in this regard.