Only once many years ago was I ever actually suicidal, but now today I say the same as you although about life: I no longer fear living. I am okay with it, and even if "things" never get any better for me.

With all my various troubles considered, I am aware my life could end in one way or another at any moment...and then the number of people at my funeral will likely be greatly dependent upon that day's weather. However, those truths no longer cause me to fret, at least not as much as in days past, and I am actually looking forward to discovering how far I truly can go rather than quitting the game (or whatever our lives actually are) early.