Quote:
Originally Posted by TishaBuv
What happened that started the great relationship to turn to abuse?
I don't think people just turn evil out of nowhere.
I'm not sure if figuring out what started this struggle will help the OP, but in my relationship, there is an issue, a real issue, that escalated the frustration, the inability to solve or compromise. There has to be a root to address, IMHO.
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He quite simply wanted out, he wanted out of the relationship and the responsibility of being a parent to 6 kids.
But he was too much of a coward to end it and I was too stubborn to let go.
So he gradually made things unbearable, I still refused to leave despite the damage it was doing to our kids.
Until he put me in the hospital. At which point the child welfare stepped in.
Said I could keep kids only if he was out.
That woke me up.
I was so in love with what we had I could not accept it was broken beyond repair.
I do not consider my ex a habitual abuser as such, because I don't for one minute think he would raise his hands to anyone else.
We had become so fixed in a way of being we couldn't get out of it. And he didn't want to work it out.
OP, and his wife are in this same kind of cycle, but she is hitting her child so he needs to get her out now.
No if buts or maybe's.
I might have excused violence towards me but had he raised a hand to our kids I would have killed him and he knew it.
Sort things out after your daughter is safe.