Quote:
Originally Posted by slowandgentle
*Trigger warning*
I don't think him not receiving the email is what's going on. I made the mistake of telling him I wanted to be held by him, at the end of last year. Then I started having these intrusive images of me...'servicing' him. Best way I can think of to put it. He decided that we were too close for me, and that the images meant I felt violated by him. I think he is deliberately creating distance. Which I could handle if we had regular sessions, but I haven't seen him for a month & my email said really clearly I was struggling and conflicted and reaching out to try to reconnect. I am so afraid of being too much and demanding too much, I don't think I can push about the emails. I feel like I have done nothing but raise isssues with him for the past 6 mths.
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*Trigger warning*
So because the process or the nature of the relationship or something in his behavior or demeanor has provoked these intrusive images and needs, he is punishing you by distancing himself? And after you took the risk of disclosing this? Isn't that a profound betrayal?
I disclosed some risky and painful things to my former therapist, along the same lines, and she also withdrew emotionally for a while, then eventually got rid of me. I felt i had had been violated and used. Was like emotional r*p*. People start shrieking and pulling at their hair if you poison the sanctity of therapy with such talk, but it's the truth. The experience of being coaxed into these intimate disclosures, then subtly shamed or punished for not saying just the right thing, then abandoned -- whether literally or emotionally -- is pretty dangerous. The power dynamics make it so. Was very perverse.
Some therapists are dumb as a post. If you're gonna pull this stuff out of people you'd better be prepared for the result.