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Originally Posted by Theresa1991
That is something, already. Thank you.
I feel like I cannot share these experiences with anybody in the real world, because I don't want to see them look at me in disgust. I already have kind of the fame of being the "intelligent and kind of weird drinker". I don't like that. And just the thought of telling them ALL there is to tell makes me want to crawl in a cave and never come out again.
Doctors are so disappointing. Just because I am keeping it together on the outside doesn't mean it is not really bad on the inside. I feel SICK. Not just "not okay". Really ILL. I know there is something really wrong with me and I get so anxious thinking about how I am wrecking my life without anybody noticing.
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You don't have to share! You have the right to keep information about your health private!
You can gain some sort of control of your drinking if you train before you go out on how to tackle such situations (on how to behave and what to say: "I feel so happy in myself that I don't need so many drinks today" or something almost similar).
I had a big problem with cigarettes years ago. Because I experienced my "smoking-habits" as loss of control, l I was too afraid to lose control over drinking. I put water in my glass when nobody saw it so that my drinks were thinner and I used a long time on drinking only one glass.
Hope this might help at little bit!
I agree with you upon doctors. There must come a change where focus is on
to prevent. Since there is no help to get when one seem to be well, I made my own "danger-hierarchy" once. It was about where am I now? I had collected information about what where my red flags and felt helped to some degree when I could "self-diagnose" and try to prevent.
May be a google about 'selfhelp bipolar' or 'prevent bipolar relapse' may give you some ideas about how to stop becoming worse.
By the way, I found this link for you:
https://www.helpguide.org/articles/b...-self-help.htm
Good Luck!
