It is crushing me. I sank into the depths of the hole I can't crawl out of. This is soul crushing. I can't find joy in anything at all. I can't even find a job because they are taking their sweet **** time with my disability review. I want to do something. I NEED TO SOMETHING.

But I don't want to do anything. I am sinking hard and fast. Life is a gift you say? Really?

I hate being bipolar. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate, I ****ING HATE IT.

Please make it stop.