I see this abbot differently. You asked her if she is getting a pot belly, which is an incredibly cruel thing to say. For women who have a history of being teased about their weight (which nearly all women do), someone bringing it up can be extremely painful and triggering. She probably needs some space from you to take care of herself. She also probably doesn't want you looking at and judging her pictures online. She is not calling you names, throwing tantrums, or playing with you. She is practicing self-care by keeping her distance.