Ex-T,
It's been 2 years since you abandoned me. I'm still hurting! Maybe not as bad as when you first left, but that's thanks to T. You broke my heart into little pieces and I can't seem to find all of them. You took away my enjoyment in life. Yes, I still have little moments of joy, but they are short lived. I no longer enjoy music or my arts and crafts. I used to paint, color, crochet, create architecture, etc. Now they have all become a chore.

I was doing so good with you. I was making major improvements. Why did you take it all away? What did I do that was so wrong?

I have honored your request for no contact. I still feel like writing you. I never got the chance to express how I feel; what this has done to me! I also feel like sending you morbid, disturbing gifts. And I have bad thoughts about you. I won't do anything though. I will sit here with my pain and do nothing. I don't want a lawsuit or restraining order against me.

Do you ever think about me? Do you care? Did you ever care?

I want to believe in karma. I want to believe that you will get back what you've done to me. I wish I could see it or know it's happened. Instead, it looks like your life is happy with your new baby and all.

I can't forgive you ex-T. I don't think I will ever be able to. You left a huge gapping wound in me. I don't think I will ever be able to fully heal. You didn't even allow me closure. You're a therapist! How can you do this to someone? Do you even realize the extent that you damaged me? Two years has been a long time. I thought I'd make more progress than this. I guess it just shows how extreme the trauma you caused me.

Unfortunately, you will always be a part of my life. I will never be completely free of you. You killed a part of me. You stole some of the good in life away from me.

Here's to our 2 year anniversary!