I am truly very sorry to hear what you have been through.
I can't begin to imagine how you feel, so I won't pretend otherwise.
I will say that you will find others here who have been through similar and can understand your pain far better than I.
It sounds as though you have proved yourself stronger than most, despite the fact it may not feel that way.
It took me 6years to headroom a 10 year relationship also with 4 kids, so don't feel you need to put a time limit on this. 22 years is a long time, it's such a shame you have up your friendships and hobbies, it's at times such as these those things help us gain perspective and offer support.
I similarly have up everything for my partner, I understand now how unhealthy that was for me as a person and my ability to adapt.
Isolation can make things seem bigger and uglier and almost insurmountable.

I hope you are able to reach out, since money is an issue perhaps volunteering, and giving something back could help you meet people and perhaps build your self-esteem.

It really is one day at a time, don't try and look to far forward or it can reAlly pull you down and make things seem impossible.
Just concentrate on getting through today. Make simple plans and stick to them.
And as hard as it is try not to compare what your ex has to what you have.
Honestly, I would not worry about wether you can love or trust again. Those are things far in the future, once you have begun to heal. Once you have managed to accept the loss of the woman you thought your wife was.

Please be kind to yourself and take your time. Take care.