Hi Mr. Stranger, I just want to acknowledge your fear. Yes, there are many reasons why people don't change. Fear is another one. You asked me how I started the process to change myself, I think. I don't know. One night, when I was 23, I was so down and hopeless that I started writing. It was a still small but strong and kind voice that said that they were here for me and it was going to be ok. I thought I'd lost it and I probably had. But it made me feel better. I think that night, I found my inner light for just a moment. It didn't end well for me or anything. I had many difficult times. But I now know that voice, is the truth, it is loving, it could be god him or herself. . I just know that I rely on it now most days. I notice you are supportive of others here and say kind things to them. Pretend you are one of us, and write down a problem u r having. Answer it as if you are talking to one of us.