So sorry this happened to you. I'm female but non-traditional, although I may look like it on the outside. Have you looked into the topic of "relational aggression"? It's what females tend to do more often than direct confrontation. I prefer direct, explicit confrontation, but that makes me an oddball, a misfit, an outcast in some circles of women.

I think relational aggression is just as hurtful, if not more so, than a direct attack, because it's so hard to see sometimes. Yet for women, and some men, who dislike conflict and confrontation it seems to be the method of choice. And I guess if that T was not very well-trained or very mature or something, and felt threatened by you, then that's what she did to "gain" an upper hand. Understandable by this old lady, perhaps, but horrifying in its effect on you. I can definitely understand that, too, and since you were the client it seems very clear that YOUR distress should be the focus, not hers. Unfortunately, it sounds as if she couldn't do that.

Also, unfortunately, the MH profession seems to me to be dominated currently by females with this penchant for conflict avoidance. Or at least it is very prevalent and I was certainly clueless that perhaps I needed to look for someone with a different orientation. I was so used to force fitting myself outwardly into the mold approved of by female authorities and rule-makers.

Well, I've learned something, at least, in my 50 years of therapy on and off. Even people with MH issues may learn things over the course of living and their life experiences. Too bad, as I've said on other threads, that the profession can't learn very well from it's members' life experiences, or maybe it's just that the T's just stay stuck in their preconceived notions and don't learn from us at all.

And that ^^ is an example of a somewhat relationally aggressive comment, because my regular direct, respectful comments and conflicts are not heard by the profession. In my experience they tend to like and respond to feelings, not thoughts. Sure, feelings have their place in life, but thoughts do, too.