welcome to the real world ... many organizations (church or secular) tend to act cult-like in that they demand total obedience to there life style rules or their standards ... many due this to "protect" the other members from outside influence ... or maybe to (in there mind's set) to protect you from yourself ... but most (my opinion) due this to protect there power over the members ...

as I see it you have two choices ... sell your soul and toe there mark , kiss the ground they walk on and beg to be accepted on there terms and live your life on there terms ... or ... accept things as they are and life your life as you desire ... I do not know there mindset but you may ... if they had your best interest maybe you should reconsider ... there is also a chance you may just be rebelling using the church in place of your parents ... if this social connection means that much to you ... then you need to decide why ... and decide if you want to save it ...

I really do wish you find peace in your life as it sounds that you are being pulled in many different directions .... Tigger ..

ps: this is and always has been your decision ... and the results are totally your responsibility ... they were clear up front ... what was coming ...