Hey infinity!!

I'm almost sorry for giving him the benefit of the doubt!! I do not think you should try to see his T or pdoc, as they won't tell you anything due to patient/ dr. privilege. They can't as a rule unless your hubby tells them they can. It sounds to me like he's having one episode after another, only instead of confronting the situation, it's easier on him to bow out. He may be thinking he doesn't "deserve" you in the back of his mind. He's mean because he can't justify wanting to leave you, so he figures if he sabotages your relationship you'll leave him!!! Maybe he really DOES want a divorce, but nine times out of ten, that's the Bipolar talking.
Half that house is yours, too, ya know. Tell him you want him to buy you out then, and give him what he wants. Later
he may change his mind, but it will be too late for that. Call
his bluff, see what he says. I'm grasping at straws here as
when I'm in an episode, I say the same thing to my husband at times!!! He knows now though, that it's the disability trying to take control.

Unfortunately, this illness does cause a breakdown in marriages, depending on the degree of the relationship. If
he has said " I don't love you anymore".....he doesn't know what he wants. He thinks he does. He is in denial big time
and sometimes that's the straw that breaks the camels back. You have that young boy to think about and protect.
That should be your main priority right now. Give him his space, and move along with your life. It's been too hard and you've tried everything you could. YOu may have to bail out to save yourself.......and that's okay. He has to know what's right and wrong, and you can't always appease him.
Don't let him use this condition to control YOU!!! At some point he has to take responsibility for his actions!!!