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Originally Posted by Skies
The way i see it, since you asked for another viewpoint-the boundary is not 'set for you'. That is his boundary. It's up to you to decide if you want him to impose his will on you and how you will react. Likewise, you can set a boundary with him to not email you for scheduling changes, and instead text you or call you.
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I understand what you mean now. I think the issue was semantics. I agree that our boundaries are not set for us by others (i.e: my mother does not decide what my boundaries are, I DO), but while we are impacted by boundaries that others define for themselves, we choose whether or not we want to work within them. To use the email example, my T has every right to choose not to allow email communication between sessions with his clients. However, if email communication between sessions is important to me, I can choose to find another T that offers this.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Skies
If you were disclosing trauma and you were in the middle of a sentence at the exact ending of the session, being rigid and inflexible would be cutting you off in mid sentence to end the session at the exact time. Unless there was a fire in the building, cutting you off like that in mid-sentence is acting like an a s s hole, not implementing good boundaries. Flexible and reasonable would be allowing 10-20 seconds for you to end your thought. A person with healthy boundaries would make exceptions here and there.
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I completely agree with this. Rigid inflexibility for the purpose of holding a boundary is short-sighted.