Former T-i may ask you a couple of sessions. Afraid to ask because insurance wont cover and i cant afford it but dont want to mention money if you offer a low rate or free, i will feel as if i tried to manipulate you even though its not the truth. It will still feel that way, T points out how im trying to 'get' something, regardless of what my motivations actually are.

Triple messages tonight, i guess that shows how desperate i feel right now. ⛈ what a mess i am. My decision making might as well be a huge pile of grief.

I need to stop thinking of this. If only i could sleep like a normal person. Or better yet, when i do ever get to sleep, never wake up.