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Originally Posted by scatterbrained04
Just venting. I had a bad depression/mixed episode 5-6 years ago. Following which I sought help and was diagnosed BP2/GAD and placed on medication.
Ever since then, I've never gotten my life back. I don't experience joy or pleasure. All of my hobbies and things I enjoy went by the wayside. I find no joy in social situations. Always feel empty or on the outside looking in. Even when I am well. I might have one day once every blue moon that I feel anything. I used to do things with my son and felt close to him. No more. I am there for him, but not really THERE for him. I don't know if this is caused by medication or I'm just doomed to be like this now. I'm just stuck. I don't know what to do. Feels almost like a life not worth living.
Feel free to pipe in. Just needed to talk about it.
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I'm so sorry you're having this problem. I was diagnosed with the same thing BP2/GAD several years ago and had this problem and sometimes still do. When I was put on Lithium, which I don't take now, I felt like a robot. No emotion good or bad. I have more depressed days than not and I know this sounds goofy but at the end of each day no matter what I try to write down 3 "magic moments" and on the bad days it can be anything. Some days I put down my hurricane force fan (I'm always hot) and how it felt as one. Some other days it's a little bit better. Some days it's really good like floating on my noodle in the pool in the sunshine.
I agree with one of the previous posters. Could it be your medication? Could you talk to your doc? I hope this gets better for you. I understand.